Saturday, September 15, 2007

Ready, steady, pass-out!

So yesterday, I found myself once again in the protective wings of the BC Medical System. I had to go in for a checkup to make sure the lung isn't going to make a comeback like so many cheesy Hollywood villains. You know the scene, right when you're about to deliver that snappy one-liner in front of guests at a formal dinner setting, Baron Von Lung-Puncture smashes through the stained-glass windows and with a curteous bow, steals the show with a verbatim recitation of Les Miserables... or something to that effect. The point is, I just don't want it to come back. That entails a trip to the good Dr.
The problem isn't when your new doctor wants all your details, or wants you to sign a couple of forms, or wants you to ruin your hair by taking your shirt off. No no, the problem is when said doctor requests a blood test - oh yes.
I'm not good with blood tests. I have what some friends affectionately refer to as "lame-ass stupid... guy... that doesn't like blood tests and needles" syndrome. (yes that's the one..)

Anyway, I decided with some consideration, that today I wanted to change that. When I walked into the lab, I walked in with confidence, and a 'who gives a fig' attitude, surely the way to do it.

I sat there as the nurse put the needle in, and didn't wince (much) as she set the first vial of blood on the desk next to me. Or the second. Or the third.
I just kept looking out the window.

When it was done and the nurse took the samples away, I stayed in the chair, holding that little bit of cotton wool & telling myself "Hey now, that wasn't so bad at all was it. Yeah. That was fine, you feel fine, you look fine! Nice one! ... What's this weird feel-"

"JAMES."

"-up James.. Ok.. that's better, sit up, look at me."

I opened my eyes to see two nurses fanning me, not slowly, like sultan-on-a-large-pillow style, more like 'this shmuck just fainted' style - which is rapidly.
Wow.. I've never passed out before. It feels much worse than it looks really. First you're freezing, then you're hot, then you've got pins and needles, then you're thinking you're not going back to work that afternoon, wondering if Lost is coming back in December or January, and what the migration route of the Alaskan moose is.. It's a whirlpool of emotion.

Anyway, half an hour or so of sitting on a chair sipping apple-juice will fix it up. I left the place, got lunch and went home. One day I hope to be rid of this fear of needles. I encourage all of you out there who have passed out (not from alcohol.. there's a special site for that) to tell of your experience/s in the comments. I don't have brownie points, but it'll be darn entertaining anyway!
Anyway, Dave's coming on Monday and I needs to clean up my bedroom, which friends [see above] have affectionately labeled: "Little Dresden".
Peace all!

Jimzip :D

Friday, September 7, 2007

Escaping hospitals, a realistic outlook, & the coming of fall.

I had a dream that I was snowboarding the other night. The problem was that every time I'd get near the bottom of the run, the wind would blow me back up to the top.. For some people that's a dream, for me it was certainly closer to a nightmare, & I think it aptly summed up the last few months of the medical-side of my life, constantly trying to make progress, but getting nowhere.
First off, it's best if I simply say that I finally got my lung fixed up. Against my better judgement (having the whole damned thing removed), I opted for surgery, which would leave me with two working lungs, capable of once again actually delivering O2.
(For those of you that are missing the connection here: I punctured my lung last year around October, and it's been continuously giving me grief since... good times...)

Organising the operation was a story unto itself, however, after bouncing back and forth between the surgery & the hospital switchboard, we finally arranged a time.
I had called the surgery on a Wednesday, the op was scheduled for that Friday, mum arrived on Thursday. Yep - if ever you want to see your mother pack luggage & fly across the pacific in less than 48 hours, telling her you're going into surgery that week seems to do the trick.
In the end, I don't know what I'd have done without her here really. I was one inch away from vegetable when I was groggily 'discharged' from the hospital the morning after the surgery (the morning after! Time to recover, anyone?), and was barely different for a good 6 days or so afterwards.
It really was great to see her again so soon, despite my inability to do anything interesting for most of her stay. She was amazing anyway. I only get to see family twice a year now that I'm in Canadia, so three times is like having another birthday. (Not the getting older part.. I mean the happy part, with the laughing and the presents and - whatever).
Also, the timing couldn't have been better, I head off to Hawaii with Dave on the 21st of this month, and after any surgery you're supposed to give a full 3-4 week window before flying, I made it with 6 days to spare.
So! That's the end of that chapter! (Oh and I'm now the proud owner of two staples in my left lung..)

With the operation over, & my health heading back to the positive side of the spectrum once again, it was time for me to begin thinking about other things, namely carrot soup. However one can only ponder such things for a short time, and soon I began thinking about things that aren't so mundane.
Firstly (and this is the last you'll hear of it), the blog mystery is over. I'm not saying another word about it. The posts and clues will remain up for you to explore as you will, but the final word on the matter is most certainly: patience. You're going to need it, just like I'm going to. Thanks to all who participated and joined the ride. ;)

Finally, and I'm uber excited about this. I have the dates of my return to Oz for this year! ("Huzzah!" shout some, while others leap into bushes and deadbolt front doors..) For now let's say mid-December, but I'm hoping that I'm able to get a bit of snowboarding in before I have to come back to droughtsville. Proper snowboarding, and this time if the wind tries to blow me away from the end of the run, I'll use my new super-titanium-reinforced lung to blow right back at it.

Cheers all!

Jimzip :D

Monday, September 3, 2007






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